I have a radical concept for you. Everyone deserves forgiveness.
Yes, everyone, and that includes YOU.
Maybe you don’t like this. Maybe you are not ready to forgive your abusive father. How about I try another angle?
Forgiveness is the eradicator of karma- the balancing force of the Universe, according to The Law of One.
The Universe has given you a valuable resource to help you forgive: your anger. Your anger shows you where forgiveness is needed. You may think that you have forgiven a past partner who hurt you, but if there is still some anger that comes up, consider that you have not finished the forgiveness process.
Please see my Karma Clearing Forgiveness Mediation post for info on how to move through the forgiveness process which is especially tough when we still feel pain or anger. Forgiveness does not mean we have to trust someone again; forgiveness means we let go of toxic anger.
1 Even when we have fully forgiven someone, there can still be sadness or grief. When someone betrays us, it hurts us deeply, and may take a lot of time to heal. Forgiving someone does not magically take all the pain away, but it takes the anger and condemnation away. When we can peel back the layer of anger through the forgiveness process, we are likely to find sadness. This sadness is often a re-stimulation of a childhood wound and is a sign that something needs to be healed. This sadness is begging to be acknowledged, validated, and cleared. Healing old wounds frees your soul from having to re-experience similar traumas in the future. (Check out my post on healing childhood wounds to resolve harmful life patterns.)
2 Forgiveness clears up “karma.” According to the phenomenal and extensive channeled material called the Law of One (18.12): “Forgiveness is the eradicator of karma.” I am not talking about the religious fear provoking concept of karma. I am talking about the balancing force of the Universe so no being goes too far in the directions of the “abuser” and the “abused” or “light” (creation) and “dark” (destruction). Consciousness came to Earth as “you” and “everyone else” to experience, explore, learn, grow, and heal. Karmic forces help our souls to have the experiences we need in order to evolve in the ways we desire. Karmic forces are not punishing, but they can be quite unpleasant. Forgiving someone who hurt you helps to clear karmic patterns, so your soul can go on to other experiences.
3 Forgiving others helps them to forgive and heal as well. I had a powerful experience recently which is why I am writing this post. I was meditating and I heard “your grandfather is here.” I thought it was my mother’s father and was really happy and then I heard, “from your father’s side.” I admit my heart sank a bit with uncertainty. I had never communicated with him before, and I knew he had been involved with very dark crimes when he was alive. He told me that he was very sorry for all of the pain and abuse. I knew he meant both what he did and what my father did. He told me that my phone call last week to my father was very healing to the family because I told my dad that I forgave him for the first time. My forgiveness created a ripple that helped my grandfather to face his own demons. Forgiving family members helps to heal the ancestral line. Many of us on the planet are here to clean up our ancestral trauma. I know I am.
4 Forgiving oneself helps to clear any soul tendencies toward self-sacrifice and unhealthy boundaries. Most of my past lives that I am aware of are very dark. I have struggled coming to terms with these dark lives. I finally realized I have been shown these dark incarnations because my soul has been carrying these burdens because I had not forgiven myself. As a soul planning my incarnations, I have tended toward self-sacrifice as a way to redeem myself. I now know through the power of forgiveness that I do not have to punish myself anymore.
5 One great truth that many of us have forgotten is that we are all one. There is no such thing as other. (See my post on Who is the One?) Forgiving others is the same as forgiving yourself. Forgiveness sends waves of healing energy all over the planet and Cosmos. Forgiveness helps to relieve the collective’s karmic energies so we can all move on to the next adventure after this current holographic video game experience of duality we call life on Earth.
I would like to also add a few more things to consider:
1 Hurt people hurt people. Everyone has pain from childhood because everyone was raised by imperfect parents who were hurt by their parents and so forth. Often when people are cruel, it is their hurt
inner child who is acting out. Many people are walking around being ruled by their young wounded inner selves making a mess of their lives because a child cannot navigate adult experiences. Can you see the hurt 6 year old the next time someone is unkind to you? Express your anger about how they have crossed your boundaries, but do not have to hold on to this anger. Express it and let it go. Would you hold a grudge against a 6 year old? Everyone has suffered greatly and not everyone has had the resources to heal, so as a result they often lash out at others.
2 I do not support any organized religions but I do want to quote Jesus (after all, not even Jesus was a Christian!) “Forgive them father for they know not what they do.” He said this about those who hurt him and betrayed him. Jesus knew that hurt people hurt others and that they did not have the spiritual maturity to fully comprehend what they were doing.
3 We make soul contracts with people before we are born so that we can both have experiences that our souls desire. When someone agrees to hurt you with a soul contract, they are straying form their natural state of love and they are willing to do this because they love you. Anyone who hurts someone else always suffers as well; it’s how the matrix works. My ex-boyfriend who stole thousands of dollars from me is one of my greatest teachers, and I have no doubt we had a soul contract for him to do this. My abusive childhood left me with not concept of healthy boundaries or saying “no”. He taught me about boundaries and self worth, and the pain put me on my spiritual path.
And finally…
4 Consider that there is no right or wrong; there are just many experiences to choose from. Since there is no right or wrong, there is actually no need for forgiveness. Our creator never condemns; only we condemn ourselves and each other. It is easier to consider that there is no right or wrong if you can also consider that darkness and pain serve. It was very painful when my ex stole thousands of dollars from me, and it also woke me up to how much I had self-sacrificed and that I mattered just as much as anyone else. Learning how much I matter at 25 saved me from a lifetime of self-imposed abuse. Spiritually speaking, it was not “wrong” for him to steal from me because my soul needed the lessons on healthy boundaries and saying no.
